A colleague recently shared this statement with me, sadly I don’t know who the author is:
Disappointment is temporary, only your thought about it is permanent. Change your mind about what has disappointed you and you will change your life.
I realised the truth of the statement not only with regard to myself but also my clients. Being continually disappointed with our lives, our families, our friends, our jobs, our homes … the list goes on … is it real or is it a habit that we have perhaps learned from family and friends or a mechanism we have developed to help us deal with day to day life.
If you only ever expect to be disappointed on a daily basis then you won’t be disappointed!!!
We create our own default position in life, of course there are days, tasks and indeed situations that we would all rather avoid or not have to endure. But they are part of life and need not be the burden that perhaps we have allowed them to become.
If you change your attitude towards a situation and indeed a person then they will adapt. They won’t be consciously aware of why they are changing their response to you but they will.
Our behaviours are learned, from parents, guardians, teachers, friends and work colleagues. We take what we feel is acceptable for our lives and incorporate it but sometimes unwanted behaviours creep in and somehow enter our default setting and become an unwanted part of our lives.
Something simple that you could do is before you go to sleep at night is to make a note of three things that happened in your day that you are grateful for. It can be something simple such as someone smiled at you, you made a lovely cup of tea, you heard some birdsong, it doesn’t matter how small it may seem. What is important is that you have noticed it.
Keep doing this for at least a week and you will notice that you are now more aware of the simple pleasures that present themselves to you in your daily life. By the second week your unconscious will be actively seeking out items for you to note each evening. It really does work and help you to start changing your default position of always looking for disappointment.
If you always do what you have always done, you’ll always get what you have always got. Tony Robbins
Cognitive Hypnotherapy can help you to change unwanted habits and behaviours including being disappointed all the time, to something more positive and useful in your life. Because everything doesn’t have to be the way it has always been.